Brides are only human -- and they're bound to make mistakes.
No biggie. But since we hear about some common wedding
blunders all the time, we figured why not give you the heads
-up? Here are 10 wedding mistakes to avoid.
Doing Anything...Before the Guest List
The problem: You're engaged! You're excited! You're ready to
send out save-the-dates, book that reception hall, choose
those flowers -- now! Well hang on a second, because we're
afraid you're forgetting something. Who's coming to this
affair, exactly?
The solution: It's not the most fun part of planning (and
we'll be honest, it's one of the most likely to lead to a
fight or two or twelve), but you shouldn't make any wed-day
decisions before you have your wedding guest list somewhat
firmly in place. Why, you ask? Well, do you want to have a
nonrefundable deposit down on that cozy restaurant room that
fits 75 when your mother-in-law's additions bump your list up
over 200? Exactly. Once everyone's in agreement, then you can
move forward. That said, this means that one of the parts of
your wedding you can plan immediately (or at least talk over
with your fiance) is what kind of atmosphere you'd like for
your wedding. Do you want an intimate, close friends and
family-only affair, or do you want to throw the event of the
season for 300-plus people? Later, when you're in the guest-
list trenches, this bit of planning will help back up your
gut instinct about whether to say yes (or no) to guest-list
additions.
Reading Aloud to Your Fiance ... From Bridal Magazines
The problem: Look, we know it's not the Stone Age, and there
are plenty of guys out there who want to see their wedding as
an event that reflects their style too (or at least one that
isn't dripping with pink froufrou). But there's likely to be
a limit to your fiance's ability to cope with an infinite
array of invitation choices.
The solution: Here's how to defuse a potentially sticky
situation (and a minefield of fights you don't want to have).
Take a night off to go out to dinner and talk with him about
all the different parts of the wedding, and try to get a
concrete idea of his interest in the various details. Does it
sound like flowers are flowers in his book? Okay, then you
can more or less leave him out of that decision. And if he's
cramming lettuce leaves in his ears to block sound, you
definitely don't want to drag him into it.
Moving forward, save his sanity (and yours) by designating
one night a week as wedding-free. Talk about the weather,
your friends, the dog -- whatever you want. He'll be psyched
to see that the girl he fell in love with still lives there,
and you'll appreciate the breather yourself. And who knows?
Left to his own devices, your fiance just might surprise you
with a great idea for your cocktail hour or the perfect
solution to a guest-list dilemma.
Freaking Out Because Someone Else Has Your Gown
The problem: These days, to-be-weds spend so much time
personalizing their weddings and trying to find really unique
big-day details that it does seem reasonable to freak if
another couple chooses the same favors or flowers or food.
Before you decide to arm-wrestle for it, let us suggest a
different way of dealing.
The solution: If someone else steals one of your ideas,
you'll probably hear a lot of imitation is the sincerest form
of flattery and It will be at your wedding, not theirs, so
it'll be totally different. Whether these statements are true
or not (they are), they're probably not going to make you
feel better -- but neither will stewing over it. Instead of
worrying about someone else's wedding looking the same as
yours, think about how you can make the copied detail
different. If a friend chooses the same gown as you, add
details to make yours unique: Accessorize with a brooch, add
a sash, accent the train with some embroidery (you get the
idea). Has someone else swiped your fun favor idea? Find a
way you can package yours to set them apart. And if you're
really that worried about copycats, here's a thought -- just
keep mum. If you don't divulge every last big-day detail, you
won't have to worry about your bride friends snatching them.
Realizing That Grape isn't Your Color ... With Two Months to
Go
The problem: When you started planning your wedding, you knew
just what you wanted: pink bridesmaid dresses, peonies, and
classic, engraved invites. Now that you've been hard at work
for a few months, you know just what wedding colors you want:
jewel tones, orchids, and funky, bold invites. Too bad --
you're stuck with the wedding style you first chose ... or
are you?
The solution: You should feel free to rethink, redo, and
revamp any element of your wedding that you want -- unless
you've accepted a ring from it (just kidding). This doesn't
have to mean yet another huge investment or reneging on a
bunch of contracts -- you'll be surprised how easy it is to
make simple additions or subtractions and change your whole
style. Already ordered those pastel bridesmaid dresses? Think
about adding a bold sash or accessorizing with chandelier
earrings to liven them up a bit. Unsure about the color
scheme you chose? Pay an extra visit to your florist and work
out changes to your bouquets and centerpieces -- adding new
blooms in all of your arrangements will introduce a new color
throughout the room. Same thing if you've already ordered the
linens -- spice them up with bright table runners or
overlays. If you decide you really can't live with it,
chances are you can go back on your first choice -- just
remember that it will have a cost. A good rule of thumb is
that if you've already signed a contract or seen a proof, you
will have to pay extra for any changes or additions you make.
But if it's still relatively early in your planning process,
don't be afraid to make the change. Remember, you're getting
married to your husband, not your centerpieces.
Trying to Drop Two Sizes Before Your Final Fitting
The problem: You've found the wedding dress of your dreams --
though it's not exactly a perfect fit on the real-life you.
Your plan: Order the dress two sizes too small, and then do
whatever it takes to make it fit. Or so you think.
The solution: Making a commitment to eat right and exercise
is great whether you're planning your wedding or trying to
stave off the newlywed nine. On the other hand, crash-dieting
and chaining yourself to the StairMaster is a course likely
to end in disaster -- and a gown that doesn't fit.
Instead of losing more sleep than weight, find a gown you
love and order it in your current size. If you want to work
on your body during your engagement, that's great -- go
ahead, but be sure to make your goals are manageable (toning
up but not dropping 20 pounds, for instance). You're more
likely to stick with a routine that doesn't require
superhuman willpower. And if you still find that you are
freaking about your figure, just remember that you're about
to get hitched to someone who can't get enough of the way you
look (really, truly) right now.
If you do drop some weight, this slow-and-steady approach
will help you big time (and help you keep it off long-term).
You'll want to lose those extra pounds before your second
fitting -- any big changes after that, and though you might
be lighter, your alterations bill will be pretty hefty. Your
final fitting should be for last-minute tweaks, not a total
overhaul.
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